Eat their socks!
Impressed with the multi-tasking? ECing a babe in one hand, photographing it with the other :)
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Some Folk Read On The Toilet, Others....
Impressed with the multi-tasking? ECing a babe in one hand, photographing it with the other :)
Friday, July 18, 2008
Myths Relating To EC
Below are some of the more common myths about EC that I have come across. If you can think of any others please comment and I'll add them to the list :)
MYTH 1. It's about training babies to eliminate when it is convenient for parents.
EC does not involve any baby training. It simply nurtures a baby's natural awareness of her urge to eliminate, and encourages her to let her parents know when she feels these urges. For more on this click here.
MYTH 2. Babies don't know when they need to eliminate until they are already doing it.
If you take note of the way a baby moves and the sounds she makes minutes before she soils her nappy, a pattern of behaviour will become clear to you. Quite often when a baby seems frustrated she is actually telling you she feels the urge to eliminate coming on.
If you take note of the way a baby moves and the sounds she makes minutes before she soils her nappy, a pattern of behaviour will become clear to you. Quite often when a baby seems frustrated she is actually telling you she feels the urge to eliminate coming on.
MYTH 3. There is not enough time between when a baby lets you know she needs to eliminate and getting her into position over a potty, bowl, toilet, or sink.
There is :) Especially if you have your bub in EC friendly clothing.
There is :) Especially if you have your bub in EC friendly clothing.
MYTH 4. It's messy.
My partner and I were surprised to discover it was far cleaner to EC than use nappies. There is little to no mess to wipe off your baby because it has all dropped below her rather than against her skin. And your potty, bowl, or sink can be quickly rinsed with water, or your toilet flushed, and hey presto you're done. Unexpected baby vomit is worse, and happens more often! :D
MYTH 5. Children who EC struggle to move to toileting independence. This myth really confuses me! If anything EC kids will find the transition to toileting independence easier and quicker than nappy kids because they have not lost the awareness they have about when they need to eliminate. I think this myth comes from people's understanding that EC involves more parent than child training, and thus some people assume that the child doesn't learn anything. In fact the child learns that:
My partner and I were surprised to discover it was far cleaner to EC than use nappies. There is little to no mess to wipe off your baby because it has all dropped below her rather than against her skin. And your potty, bowl, or sink can be quickly rinsed with water, or your toilet flushed, and hey presto you're done. Unexpected baby vomit is worse, and happens more often! :D
MYTH 5. Children who EC struggle to move to toileting independence. This myth really confuses me! If anything EC kids will find the transition to toileting independence easier and quicker than nappy kids because they have not lost the awareness they have about when they need to eliminate. I think this myth comes from people's understanding that EC involves more parent than child training, and thus some people assume that the child doesn't learn anything. In fact the child learns that:
- her parents are listening to her and will respond to her communication,
- the sensations she is feeling inside of her equal the need to wee or poo,
- when she needs to wee and poo just let mum or dad know and they'll help keep me clean and dry,
- wee and poo is something you do into an object separate from herself and her clothing,
MYTH 6. It's time consuming.
Often when people criticise my partner and I for ECing they say "too much time on their hands", "get a life". It really takes little time at all to EC, and if you count nappy buying, cleaning, drying, and disposing of, EC actually takes far less time. It can take time to learn your baby's signals, just as it takes time to learn anything new, but you will probably be surprised by how quickly you get it, and once you do, you'll never look back.
And as far as "getting a life" goes, almost all parents prioritise the well-being of their children in their own lives. They tune into their babies eating and sleeping needs, ever ready to comfort their children when hurt or distressed. Parents who EC are exactly the same, except that they also include tuning in and responding to their children's elimination urges as part of their everyday nurturing.
MYTH 7. It's not EC if you use nappies at all. It is entirely possible to practice EC and have your baby in nappies if you are nervous about getting misses on the floor. It is easier to EC without nappies because you notice the misses immediately, and you learn your baby's cues quicker. But as long as you are watching and listening for your baby's elimination cues, and responding to the cues by holding your baby over a bucket, potty, toilet, sink, bowl, or ground outside, it still counts as EC.
MYTH 8. EC is too hard to bother with if you have more than one child. This myth is based on the assumption that parents who EC have too much time on their hands. It is entirely possible to EC your baby while caring for their older siblings. The friend who introduced me to EC was practicing EC with her baby and caring for a spirited two year old at the same time. I also know of a family with seven children who EC'd their baby and toilet trained the next two youngest children! Older children can be great at understanding and recognising their baby sibling's elimination cues and can be terrific help to EC parents.
Often when people criticise my partner and I for ECing they say "too much time on their hands", "get a life". It really takes little time at all to EC, and if you count nappy buying, cleaning, drying, and disposing of, EC actually takes far less time. It can take time to learn your baby's signals, just as it takes time to learn anything new, but you will probably be surprised by how quickly you get it, and once you do, you'll never look back.
And as far as "getting a life" goes, almost all parents prioritise the well-being of their children in their own lives. They tune into their babies eating and sleeping needs, ever ready to comfort their children when hurt or distressed. Parents who EC are exactly the same, except that they also include tuning in and responding to their children's elimination urges as part of their everyday nurturing.
MYTH 7. It's not EC if you use nappies at all. It is entirely possible to practice EC and have your baby in nappies if you are nervous about getting misses on the floor. It is easier to EC without nappies because you notice the misses immediately, and you learn your baby's cues quicker. But as long as you are watching and listening for your baby's elimination cues, and responding to the cues by holding your baby over a bucket, potty, toilet, sink, bowl, or ground outside, it still counts as EC.
MYTH 8. EC is too hard to bother with if you have more than one child. This myth is based on the assumption that parents who EC have too much time on their hands. It is entirely possible to EC your baby while caring for their older siblings. The friend who introduced me to EC was practicing EC with her baby and caring for a spirited two year old at the same time. I also know of a family with seven children who EC'd their baby and toilet trained the next two youngest children! Older children can be great at understanding and recognising their baby sibling's elimination cues and can be terrific help to EC parents.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Interested in Knitting? Interested in EC?
Then I've got good news for you! April and I have started a group on Ravelry, the ultimate online network for knitters, for all those who want to knit EC friendly clothes:
And, since I can't really make April my knitting slave, and she is currently my only source of custom made EC friendly clothing, I have taken up the challenge to learn how to knit for myself. So far I have managed to cast on. The knit stitch remains elusive, but I have high hopes for mastering it soon...ish...
Thursday, July 10, 2008
EC is NOT Toilet Training!
"They treat their children like dogs! Training them to poo in response to commands!"
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"Oh look at your daughter! She's weeing on demand. What a good girl!"
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"It doesn't seem very natural to me to make your child go to the toilet on cue"
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"Oh look at your daughter! She's weeing on demand. What a good girl!"
---
"It doesn't seem very natural to me to make your child go to the toilet on cue"
Above are all comments I have heard others make about elimination communication. And each comment is based on a misunderstanding of EC. Elimination communication is NOT about training a child to wee or poo on demand for parental convenience (although it can be coincidentally convenient to parents). The purpose and aim of elimination communication is to foster communication between parent and child and to maintain and nurture the child's natural awareness of her elimination urges.
Personally, I object to the term "infant potty/toilet training" to refer to EC because it does not accurately reflect elimination communication. EC is about communicating about elimination! Parents who practice EC do not treat their children like animals or use Pavlovian techniques to condition their children to wee or poo on cue. Rather, parents watch and listen to their children closely and learn their children's natural body language and sounds which they make when they are about to wee or poo.
ECing parents who make a sound while their children wee or poo (and not all do) do so to help strengthen their child's awareness of how it feels to eliminate. If this awareness is kept strong within children they remain clear in their communication to their parents that it is time to make a catch. In addition to maintaining strong elimination awareness in infants, making a sound (such as "sssss") while the child wees or poos helps the child to relax her body and therefore helps her release her elimination because of the association she has with weeing and pooing and that sound.
When a silly nurse said my daughter was weeing on demand I pointed out that it was the other way around; I was catching her wee on cue. If anything, EC is about parent training :)
Training or conditioning a baby to wee and poo at times based purely on parental convenience is not natural or gentle or empathetic. Parents who practice this kind of infant training are not communicating with their children, because communication is a two way street.
Personally, I object to the term "infant potty/toilet training" to refer to EC because it does not accurately reflect elimination communication. EC is about communicating about elimination! Parents who practice EC do not treat their children like animals or use Pavlovian techniques to condition their children to wee or poo on cue. Rather, parents watch and listen to their children closely and learn their children's natural body language and sounds which they make when they are about to wee or poo.
ECing parents who make a sound while their children wee or poo (and not all do) do so to help strengthen their child's awareness of how it feels to eliminate. If this awareness is kept strong within children they remain clear in their communication to their parents that it is time to make a catch. In addition to maintaining strong elimination awareness in infants, making a sound (such as "sssss") while the child wees or poos helps the child to relax her body and therefore helps her release her elimination because of the association she has with weeing and pooing and that sound.
When a silly nurse said my daughter was weeing on demand I pointed out that it was the other way around; I was catching her wee on cue. If anything, EC is about parent training :)
Training or conditioning a baby to wee and poo at times based purely on parental convenience is not natural or gentle or empathetic. Parents who practice this kind of infant training are not communicating with their children, because communication is a two way street.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Sometimes She Prefers A Miss
Further proof that ECing is really about communicating with your baby and not about a perfect catch rate is our daughter's preference for missing certain wees.
In sticking with our gentle parenting philosophies we don't hold her in the EC position, even if we know elimination is coming, if she clearly isn't happy about it. (There is a difference between when she was first adjusting to being held in the EC position and found it strange, to her "I'm not in the mood for this now" communication.)
Usually she prefers to miss than catch when she is just waking up, particularly first thing in the morning. We know after a long sleep that she needs to go, and when she doesn't but we haven't caught on and hold her over a bowl or sink she calmly waits until we catch on, sometimes whizzing her head up and back to look at our faces with a little expression of "what are you doing? I don't need the toilet" and we catch on. But when she does need to go but doesn't want us to make a catch she will cry with annoyance, as if she is saying "put me down!" (well, she IS saying that!). We put her down, watch her wee in her nappy and change it immediately.
If we were more interested with catching than communicating we would disregard her preference for missing and continue holding her in the EC position over her tub. But all that would do is communicate to her that we either aren't listening, or don't care what she's saying.
My guess is that ECing at these times wakes her up quicker than she would like. In any case these misses are evidence of successful ECing, because she communicates her desires, we listen and respond accordingly, all a little wiser for the experience.
In sticking with our gentle parenting philosophies we don't hold her in the EC position, even if we know elimination is coming, if she clearly isn't happy about it. (There is a difference between when she was first adjusting to being held in the EC position and found it strange, to her "I'm not in the mood for this now" communication.)
Usually she prefers to miss than catch when she is just waking up, particularly first thing in the morning. We know after a long sleep that she needs to go, and when she doesn't but we haven't caught on and hold her over a bowl or sink she calmly waits until we catch on, sometimes whizzing her head up and back to look at our faces with a little expression of "what are you doing? I don't need the toilet" and we catch on. But when she does need to go but doesn't want us to make a catch she will cry with annoyance, as if she is saying "put me down!" (well, she IS saying that!). We put her down, watch her wee in her nappy and change it immediately.
If we were more interested with catching than communicating we would disregard her preference for missing and continue holding her in the EC position over her tub. But all that would do is communicate to her that we either aren't listening, or don't care what she's saying.
My guess is that ECing at these times wakes her up quicker than she would like. In any case these misses are evidence of successful ECing, because she communicates her desires, we listen and respond accordingly, all a little wiser for the experience.
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